Meetings

So much is fizzing in my head right now. Tonight's meeting was another one were I wanted to rip the hair out of my head. I am trying so hard to find "purpose", to remind myself that someone needs to hear what the person is saying. That maybe I need to hear what they are saying. But ohhhhh..... it is so hard at times!!!!

Suggestion for anyone who is sharing, please spare us every single drink you have ever had, all those black outs you don't remember .... they are not any funnier because you don't remember!! And don't make stuff up. Please, please please. We can tell.

I think that part of it for me is that I want to hear about recovery more than war stories. We all have our war stories, and a couple of them to qualify, ok ... but what is life like for you now? What have you learned? How have you learned it? What is going on in your life right now? Today? Good bad, happy sad, how are you doing??? When the shit hit the fan and you wanted to drink, what made you realize you didn't HAVE TO!!!!

Experience, STRENGTH and HOPE!!!!!!!

When I speak, I hate trying to figure out the pre-qualifying. I don't know when I crossed the line, I don't think it matters. I do know from my first drink to my last, it was about getting drunk. I would like to stop it right there. But I know it is important to share the how you got there, so I do talk a little bit about the progression, and the fact that I did not have any "jackpots". As fast as I can I try to jump to the now, what I have learned, why I love the fellowship, how the God of MY understanding is working in my life. Why AA is working in my life.

God Bless the person up there tonight. I hope that they got what they needed, that someone heard what they were suppose too. And I pray that God gives me the patience I need, and teaches me to stop being so damn judgemental!!! Progress .....